This page is part of a monologue. Relax, no need to read: it may not be useful for some.
I am out of time. I am not a high performer in school. Not that I had no opportunity to apply for scholarship or such similar funding, what I encountered was when I got to the level of education to apply scholarship or financial aid for the next stage, the kind of funding is no longer available, because they have raised the pre-requsite educational level to the next one. When I reached that “next one”, they raised it further.
This is the case from school all the way to PhD.
- There were several years when I would spend weeks applying for scholarships and such fundings. I then decided the “return on investment” is very bad on my time spend, so I changed to not apply such unless they are very unusual or do not take me a lot of time to apply or some other factors.
- In the mean time, I got employment in the IT sector and I decided my salary going to fund my study is not such a bad idea. If money gets me knowledge and learning experience, so be it. That way, I don’t “owe” money to anyone or anything.
Time does not wait for anyone. The idea of “timing” is a universal idea but not universal to all.
We grow differently, absorb and consume facts in one our ways, and react to external stimulus also in contrasting ways. We get easily “out of step” with another individual (and them to us).
Since my childhood days I use three languages equally. It would be many years later than I began to realise I am “entrenched” in neither of the three. By that I mean the “draw” to one set of cultural norms and customs is much less on me than perhaps some of my friends who are from dual- or single-linguo families / communities. It’s not something measurable, except via extensive longitudinal studies with the right kind of parameters.
What’s the point then? I am not entirely sure myself, but sometimes it feels like something does not align or fit with something else. An analogy is hanging a picture on the wall. There are many elements here when you want to analyse it to the nth degree, e.g.
- characteristics and quality of the picture
- picture frame
- mechanism for hanging on the wall
- tool on the wall for the hanging of the picture (frame)
- characteristics of the match between the mechanism and the tool on the wall
- manner in which the picture was placed
Some examples to illustrate the above:
Raising a point of interest. The “point” is the bridge to the “interest”, however, hearers sometimes got excited at the bridge, and responded there, and so the discussion on the interest is lost, missed, or reduced.
Eye contact. A “purpuseful” eye contact is when we try to draw meaning from somebody by looking at them / their eyes. This can be taken by the “eye owner” as a brush and rude gesture, as if inviting them, and them only, for response. Feedback on lack of eye contact, and “over-use”, suggests that there are too many factors at play here that often it is the speakers, making eye contact to different degrees at different times, who is at the receiving end of too much or too little eye contact.
Uses of elaboration. Elaboration is used to explain an important point. This might be done to provide further information, or to explain or emphasise the boundary of that point. For example, I say I will answer the phone within 30 seconds. A point of elaboration is I don’t like hearing the continuous ringing tone. A point about “boundary” is except when in the office where the phone call might be for other teams! We often elaborate more depending on responses, including body language, from hearers. However, the nature of elaboration, and the length and depth of it, sometimes is taken by the hearers as the speaker as being uncertain or undecisive about the topic being elaborated.
