Continuing from … previously
All of us exist in multiple social circles, and in each we might behave slightly differently, uphold a different set of cultural norms etc. Even we don’t come across these circles for a very very long time (eg in decades of solitary confinement), we think of our relationship in social circles.
Social circles might be a way to think about our having multiple, shifting identities. In some situation, the change is subtle and sudden though not abrupt or noticeable. A good example might be when meeting with the older generation of our relations, when the way we speak, think, and our cultural norms could change in a big way, abruptly, but in a fitting way. This is so that both sides get on a good “wavelength” or “rhythm” to communicate and relate to each other.
To agree and on the same side
That’s far better than to stand against each other
One of my managers was keen to show that he was on “the other” side, that of the organisation, against me. However, that was for one issue that three sides did not know best to proceed. For the remainder of my time in that organisation, that manager did not act that way, or at least not “in front” of me, nor in anyway as to show that I am “on the right side”.
Another of my managers was keen that what I did and said ought to be facts-based and pragmatic; however, in many cases, there was not enough “facts” for a piece of work, without being able to tick the “facts” box, I was constantly at the starting block. Being practical is probably not my strongest asset. To take a piece of work through effectively half of the leaders of an organisation would more likely say he did not fully appreciate the “shape and form” of both sides – the working environment for this piece of work, and me. At the end of it, sometimes, the piece of work got to start with limited “facts” and practical arrangement yet to be fully set out. One employee will not have all the capabilities of all employees. To get to the point that my manager was agreeable in me proceeding with the work was, well, an unknown quantity.
Very often it’s at “crunch” times that the managers ought to be seen and heard to be on the side of their team members. My second manager above did not act that way. Various famous sayings go something like I am acting as the devil’s advocate to pick the details and loopholes, so you can better your work. But never was supporting words or actions coming my way, privately in person, or in wider gathering.
There will always be two or more sides to a story.
